I'm going to Hollywood!! And by Hollywood I mean back to Duke.

My plans for Friday was to head to Haywood county to see mom (who had a birthday Thursday) and dad. On the way I was going to stop and see my sister (who had a birthday today), my brother in law and that sweet little niece of mine. Well, plans had changed. Mom was really bad sick with that virus and I was not about to go there so I still went to spend the day with Margie and Presley and see Jason that evening. As you know, I was waiting to hear from Duke about returning for more testing. Well, I was traveling down I-26 and got to thinking how bad the reception is at their house. What if they tried to call? I decided to email the transplant coordinator and let her know that I had not heard yet and see if she could go ahead and call me. I was still about 45 minutes from Fletcher and she could call before I lost signal. So I pull over (way off the road over on the bank because I hate being right next to that traffic whipping by at 80mph) and just as I am reaching into the console to get my phone it begins to ring. Caller ID reads "Lauren Rich" which is the coordinator I was waiting to hear from. I get that feeling that I want to hear what she says but if it is bad I would rather not answer. Honestly I was almost positive they would say, you are in too good of shape to go through a transplant yet. You get around on your own and still work full time, etc. That would crush my hopes of getting off this oxygen and enjoy life so much more. So I answer and she says "We got a whole lot of records on you from all the doctors that have worked with you over the last 8 years and we were able to really get some good detail into what you have been through. You did a good job in getting information to us. We are all in agreement that we would like you to come back for some more testing. This will not be the full evaluation but only lacks a couple tests of being everything." She said that there were a couple tests that are not normally done but I am a rare enough case that these are most necessary to have a successful transplant. Also they would like me to loose 20 to 30 pounds. Now, I DO have a lil bit of a gut, but the last time I was that small I was so weak that I had trouble squatting down and standing back up. I weigh about 195 now and think 180 is fine, maybe even 175, but that last 10 pounds will be tough. I already have no butt so I hope it will leave me what I do have left. Well, I have said this whole time. You gotta man up and do what you gotta do. Sure am gonna miss them hot dogs and cheese burgers. I heard a preacher say once in a sermon about letting go, that sometimes you have to let go of one gift from God to free your hands to accept another. In my left hand there is a hot dog and in my right a cheese burger. I need to drop them so God can hand me a left lung and a right lung. Ha ha. Seriously it will be tough when you are so limited to how much you can exercise. That means I will have to be that much stricter on what goes in. Anyway, she went on to say that they would be contacting me to give me the schedules for the testing. I would be there around March 9th and they would be doing some more intense procedures than the last time such as the heart cath.  It would take 2 to 3 days for all of this. Also due to the severe scaring in my lungs they would need to do a little extra like a chest MRI to assess the damage more clearly.  So I guess this is my golden ticket to the next round. I got a yes from all the judges including that last doctor that was so negative. I guess every group has to have it's Simon. Funny thing is that I did not detect even the slightest British accent.

Second Day of Testing & Summary

On the second day of the testing, it was more like a day of meetings. I first met with the medical psychologist. Basically the goal there is to make sure I have the right mindset to take this on. If I am 100% sure that I am ready to do this. I am in good psychological standing. Not depressed or suicidal or even aware how serious this situation is. The guy I met with was good. Asked a lot of questions and the whole time I was there, I never heard a peep out of the 11 people living in my head and had no urge to stand on my head and quote the Gettysburg Address. Ha ha. I thought I would insert my own joke before I got a bunch of comments on how much he must have found wrong with me.
The next person was the financial coordinator. She was straight up business and was very knowledgeable. Above that she was very helpful to help you wrap your head around what all this could potentially cost and ways to help save. Not too much to say there. Just a lot of figures talk that made a whole lot of cents! Get it? Cents as apposed to sense. Ha ha. I am on a roll today.
Ok, we got out of there at about 2:15pm and went up to see the doctor. My appointment was at 4pm but I am hoping that they may get to see me early. So much for that. The clinic was about one hour behind. I was not seen until about 5:30pm. After a nice nap in a chair using a fleece pullover as a pillow I was brought back to see Dr. Snyder. This ended the day on a sour note. She was very direct and overall negative. Stating that there are a lot of other things they need to look at with me. Since I have had another donor transplant in my life (my stemcell transplant from when I had cancer) it was a concern to how those cells would react. The fact that I am a someone who has had cancer, even though it has been gone for 8 years is still a concern. A few other odd things about my blood counts brought some concern. These were things that have been like that for years since I beat cancer but none the less, she wants more testing done for sure if we go to the next level. This doctor seemed to only focus on the negative things that can happen. It seemed like I was pointing out the pros and she was just one big bag of cons. I guess she just wants me to be aware of what can happen. Problem is, I am all too aware of what can happen. Anything can happen from not making it through the surgery to restoring a quality to my life that is not possible while I have to use oxygen. I understand that I am a risky case but thats why I am at Duke. They do the risky transplants that other places wont take on. That may not be her true feelings and I may have read her wrong but I definitely got a negative vibe from her.
She is not the only one to make the decision. The whole group meets on Tuesdays to discuss all of our cases. I will be contacted by next Friday (Feb 19th) to be told if they want me to come down for the second round of testing. That will be a three day stay and will be more extensive. Heart catheterization, bronchoscopy, and stuff like that. Until then it is a wait.

Day One of Testing

Well this day started at 6:30AM and my first appointment was an orientation class at 8AM with the transplant coordinators. This lasted until about twenty minutes after nine. They covered a LOT of info. They told us what to expect and what was expected of us. After all there is no point in putting new lungs into someone that will not take care of them and is not willing to do what it takes to bounce back. We learned how people were selected and of all the channels of support we would have throughout. Very good information.
After that we headed upstairs to meet with the social worker who asked a lot about my health history since Cancer. She was already sitting down so I just started from the beginning. Then she asked my care givers a ton of questions. She will be giving her info to the doctors to go into making the right decisions for candidates. Then I was sent for a pulmonary function test, a blood gas reading and 6 minute walk. First they did the blood gas reading. They take a needle and go into the artery in your wrist and draw from there. It is more painful than an IV but not too bad really. I did not have a good reaction for some reason. Either because of my overall oxygen levels, the fact that I had not eat much at all, anxiety or a combination of all. I was right on the verge of passing out. It felt like an hour and a half but I am sure it was only a few minutes. I was sick feeling, had cold sweets and was burning up. I wanted to lay down but she would not let me. I felt better after about 4 cups of water. She was talking to me but I just starred at her and was really slow to respond. Ok that was the bad part of the day. Then because I am such a hard stick she informed me that someone else was coming to do it again. Imagine my excitement. I did not have that same reaction on the second one. Then we did the pulmonary function test which is a series of tests that you are in this booth breathing into an apparatus in several various ways. It measures capacities and such...so I did just like someone with trashed lungs does...bad.
Then the 6 minute walk. This is exactly what it sounds like. You walk for at least 1000 feet (if you can) as fast as you can. They have all these sensors on you to measure your heart rate and oxygen levels. As the oxygen levels fall they crank up the rate going through the tubes in your nose. Mine sounded like an air compressor by the end so I am sure it was up there but I actually went 1300 feet. And yes it kicked my butt. Took me a while to catch my breath. Then it was to get blood labs done. They drew 27 tubes of that stuff. I guess they will know a lot from all that. After that it was a simple chest X-Ray and I was done. We ate at the cafeteria together. David came down and Darlene showed him around as well. She was a great help to the both of us as far as getting around that place. After we ate she and David went to his appointment and mom, dad and I went to the hotel for a much needed nap. After David and Darlene got out they came by the hotel and we went to eat some pizza.
Tomorrow I meat with the Psychiatrist at 11:30AM then the financial coordinator at 1:00PM and then see the doctor at 4:00PM.. This means that it will be a late trip back. I hear that they are usually running late and it will most likely be a long appointment. We wont get back to the Mountains until pretty late Tuesday night.
Check back for more latter on how day two went. Day one down...many to go.
God, you keep shinning the light on the path and I will surely walk it.  

I Have Arrived

Well I am here. Raleigh, NC where I may be spending a lot more time in the future. That is if the doctors don't find any reason that this can not be done. I have prayed extensively about this and I keep getting the same message. To go on with this. He has opened the doors by bringing two people into my life that have been a big help so far. These are two people that have been where I am not too long ago. There names are David and Darlene. Darlene rode down with me and my parents and since she is familiar with everything, has shown us around the area a directed us so that things go as smooth as possible. It is amazing how God brings people into our lives just when we need them. This works in both ways. It is easy to see your benefit from having someone in your life but it is a fact that they can learn from you too. These two have been a great help, I just hope I can be the same for them somehow. If not now, maybe later. I continue to have a huge amount of peace and even though there are a lot of horror stories associated with these lung transplants there are a lot of great successes. I feel too confident in my faith and this overwhelming peace. Only something like this can come from God.
Tomorrow looks like just getting the ball started with the case worker, financial person and the psychologist. Basically I think they want to know if (1) they are gonna get paid (2) I am willing to put my body through this and (3) I am not on the edge of being crazy already. I know the answer to all three but they can't take my word for it. Smart comments on number three are not needed...thanks!  Ha ha.
My aunt shared something with me that I thought about the other day. She read this on a church sign and it is very applicable to my situation. "Faith does not make things easy, only possible". Thanks Wanda.